Elder abuse – ever heard of it? Seen it in action? It is known as any act which causes harm to an older person and is carried out by someone they know and trust such as a family member or friend. The abuse may be physical, social, financial, psychological or sexual, and can include mistreatment and neglect. I would tend to see the financial side of the abuse, but it may take many forms. Often if one form of abuse is present then others are also present at the same time.
Between 2% and 10% of the elderly are subject to some form of abuse1. 92% of the abusers are a close family member and most likely an adult child1.
We are tending to live longer due to improvements in health and lifestyle outcomes. This, combined with many older people having considerable assets due to the rising value of real estate, can lead to an “impatience” to receive inheritances. Do you feel you are entitled to your parents assets? They should be looking after you? Are you doing it tough and wish your oldies would hurry up and die so you can pay off your mortgage? Would you take it any further than just wishing?
A sense of entitlement to their parents property may see some adult children accessing their parents’ assets through many means, ranging from emotional pleas, sneaking funds out of their bank to overt pressure and fraud.
Do you know someone whom is victim to their families desires? They may find it very difficult to talk about as it is embarrassing to admit your own family is taking advantage of you. Or sometimes they are not even aware it is happening.
The government is trying to address these issues, with many services available including help lines and counsellors.
If you are subject to any forms of financial, emotional or physical abuse I urge you to seek professional help. You are not alone and it is not something to be ashamed of. In Tasmania you may ring 1800 114 469. People are here to help.
I also urge you if you know of someone who is being abused to help them get help. Whether that be lifting their confidence that it’s not right or giving them information on the issues. It’s really hard to pry into people’s personal lives, but they shouldn’t have to deal with it alone and frightened. There is now a lot of literature you could provide to show them the options available. Every circumstance is different.
So then what do we need to do about it, I guess that comes down to changing our culture. Make it fashionable to work hard for your own security and financial situation. Make it an embarrassment to live off the coat tails of your parents. Make it seem that it’s unacceptable for children to do this to their parents. Make it more known that it does occur, to report it and get help. If it was happening to your grandparents or parents, how would you feel?
If you have any questions or wish to talk to someone, the staff at Ritchie Advice would be more than happy to sit down, listen and help in any way possible.
This advice may not be suitable to you because it contains general advice which does not take into consideration any of your personal circumstances. All strategies and information provided in this article is general advice only.
Ritchie Advice Pty Ltd ABN 12 150 128 448, is a Corporate Authorised Representative 408050 of Dover Financial Advisers Pty Ltd, Australian Financial Services Licensee No. 307248.
Erin Press
